Cult Retro has released the long-awaited Stormy Tempest: Velocity Blaze. Better yet, this video is available in two versions: the Cinematic Version and the Damsel in Distress Extended Version—which features six additional minutes of the peril. Check out Sidekick’s review below.
Stormy Tempest: Velocity Blaze (Review by Sidekick)
Sometimes a producer makes a film you enjoy so much, it feels like they made it just for you. So, thank you Cult Retro for making Stormy Tempest: Velocity Blaze just for me. OK, that’s ridiculous, they obviously didn’t make it for me. But it honestly felt like they did because they hit the two most important notes that make peril movies enjoyable to me.
1. Have a heroine who is powerful and competent – And that’s what Stormy Tempest is. Cult Retro has spent the better part of three seasons portraying her that way. I hate when any producer immediately sets up their heroine as either physically weak or in any way incompetent. All of the big name producers that we cover on a regular basis almost always portray their heroines as formidable, at least at the start of their films. I think this is incredibly important, because if the heroine is portrayed as anything less than strong, it just takes something away from the experience for me. For three seasons we have seen Stormy Tempest in her share of perils, but for the most part, she has ripped through small armies of enemies, making her seem like the proverbial unstoppable force.
2. Have the heroine take on an extremely powerful, seemingly invincible opponent – This is a hallmark of all my personal favorite peril films. I generally refer to it as the Zen Pictures method of peril filmmaking, and Cult Retro nailed it perfectly. Velocity Blaze is a terrific antagonist. The background on the character is that she comes from a planet where the gravity is much stronger than that of Earth, making her extremely strong and durable. We will get into specifics soon, but Velocity Blaze absolutely lays waste to Stormy for the better part of 20 minutes. Never have we seen Stormy physically dominated like this before as Velocity Blaze literally yawns at all of Stormy’s strongest attacks. Stormy is completely outmatched both physically and technologically, and it’s tremendous to watch a heroine we think of as powerful get totally manhandled. Sorry, womanhandled.
The episode picks up shortly after the end of the last episode where Stormy was taken into custody by a moss monster. Stormy awakens, only to find that the monster has also captured Velocity Blaze and tied them both up in unbreakable vine bonds. The ladies exchange some witty reparté and have a hilarious exchange that centers around Stormy’s “boob laser.” Actually, the boob laser does come in handy when Stormy uses it to obliterate the returning moss monster.
With the monster gone, the girls are able to escape their bonds, and that’s where things start to go south for Stormy. Velocity Blaze peppers Stormy with punches to the face, kicks, stomach punches, backhand slaps, and yes, even a low blow. A low blow in a Cult Retro film! Never thought I would see the day.
Blaze then easily lifts Stormy off the ground by… well… her boob laser and just holds her in the air for several seconds, demonstrating her superior strength. Stormy does manage to escape Blaze’s grasp and runs off. Blaze pursues as Stormy fires everything she has at Blaze to no effect. When her weapons fail to have any impact, she makes a stand and tries to physically dispatch Blaze. It doesn’t go well.
Blaze takes Stormy’s best punches with barely a flinch. Blaze subjects Stormy to a “why are you hitting yourself” moment, rams her head into a log several times, throws Stormy to the ground, and incapacitates Stormy’s laser gauntlet with her boot.
The majority of the rest of the film is frankly a one sided beat down that I never thought we would see Stormy exposed to and it is beautiful. There are kicks to the stomach and face, knockouts, a long strangulation, a de-belting, a de-masking, and a drug induced interrogation. Plus, there are plenty of long panning shots of a helpless Nicola Rae and her ample “boob lasers” if you know what I mean.
Please remember that for this season the producers at Cult Retro have been making two cuts of these films. As before, we look at the extended, more peril filled cut for review purposes although you can purchase both versions in a bundle for a discounted rate.
This is absolutely an incredible film and easily fits in my personal top three peril films. There is one more episode in this season and although I like to see a heroine triumphant in the end, I wouldn’t mind seeing Velocity Blaze knock Stormy around a little more. My tastes in these films gravitate towards the PG-13 style and I believe that along with Rye’s recent Skyfire, Stormy Tempest: Velocity Blaze would serve as perfect blueprints for any producer looking to shoot a peril film.
[Note: The last four images above are from the Damsel in Distress Extended Version]
Behind the Scenes Footage from Season 4 and More!
Announcement from Cult Retro
In January of 2013 we will be producing several new projects including Stormy Tempest: Season 5 (a.k.a. “The Death of Stormy Tempest”) and Stormy Tempest: Season 6 (a.k.a “Stormy Tempest: Quests”). We also intend to produce a new season of Blue Bulleteer adventures starring Maria Paris as BB and Nicola Rae as a villainess. To learn more about these projects check out our “Looking Ahead at 2013” article. January will be a busy month and will represent a significant portion of our film output next year (along with a few other surprises throughout the year).
At this time we are accepting donations for these projects. Donations at this stage will most likely be used to assemble and order costumes, props and set pieces. As a thank you for showing your support we have assembled a special treat for you as well.
Visit Cult Retro for more information