2020 – A Message from SHL
So, first let me say this. While I know a lot of you love consistent updates and information, I do find them to be a distraction. I understand the benefits of communication, and I do not think a lack of it is a good business practice by any means. But as of now, when it comes to 1. My personal life 2. My Day job 3. Working on Superheroine films: I am literally out of free time and energy.
For example: Yesterday I woke up at 5am to get ready for work, drove an hour too work, worked for nine hours, drove an hour and a half back home, showered and ate dinner and then by 9pm, was able to sit in front of my computer and work on a film edit.
By midnight, I had to stop to get to bed and repeat the same thing today. So I slept less than five hours. I am writing this, utterly exhausted. This will be the next several weeks of my life. Possibly months with the mass amount of films I have shot and have yet to edit.
So while I could be editing a film to get it too you sooner I am instead, writing this lengthy post, and by the time I am done posting it, I would have lost most of my editing time for the night. I do not like that. I want to work on these films so I can get them to you sooner than later.
When it comes to the decisions I have to make, as of now I think the best investment of my time is working through the content and not being social on this website. Even when I am at my day job I spend my lunch breaks responding to emails regarding heroine films and content. It’s kind of all consuming. Every small decision I make is impactful from the lack of resources I have currently when it comes to the thing we are all always running out of: time.
So let’s talk about delays, reasons why, technical stuff.
Before filming The END of SHL, I made a massive investment in a new camera rig. This thing is a fucking beast. It’s been a dream of mine to own something like it, I took a loan from my 401k, and I got it. And holy shit… was I naive.
This new camera requires a whole new workflow, from the ground up. My data requirements are through the roof, my editing process has massively changed, my color grading process is long winded and my computer has suffered. For example, sitting on my desk right now is 20TBs worth of hard drive data from the new films I have shot. Which means, after I back it up like a responsible adult, is 40TBs worth of hard drives. If you are following, that’s eight hard drives that are 5TBs a piece. And every one of them is almost full. For further context, every film I made in the last ten years as a director could fit on a 5TB hard drive, like all the raw files and such. All of it.
So imagine, you have 20TBs worth of data you need to backup to a second source. You click backup. And… five days later the backup completes. The room is hot, not because the heater is on, but because your computer radiates enough heat to warm up the room for five straight days. I literally had to crack the window open.
So to say I under predicted the time it would take to iron out this new workflow, well, its an understatement. I actually had to purchase a $1000 external GPU just to playback footage, cause my computer would crash simply trying to color grade the footage in an editor.
Things that had to be updated to accommodate this new arrangement: my computer, my camera rig, memory cards, audio equipment, external GPU, travel gear to hold camera securely on airplane. Every one of these things required purchasing, delivery times, setting up, learning, and adjustments. It’s been a mammoth.
Now, real question: Will any of you notice a difference when it comes to any of this? I have absolutely no clue. (To clarify Uninvited 8 was not shot on the new camera) I hope to god you do. Cause despite all the setbacks it has come with, what it truly offers me behind the scenes is substantial headspace. Dynamic range in the image, professional gear that won’t break down on set, raw information that can pull things out of the shadows or save it from the highlights. I can bend the image more to my liking. Etc, etc.
This will afford me the ability to craft new films moving forward in a more professional manner. I hope to deliver more films this year than any year before it. And I plan on those films being over a new caliber when it comes to the productions I have made before it.
But for now, what it really means for you, the audience, as you have witnessed, is massive delays. And for that I do apologize. Cause believe me, I would love to sell you all the stuff I have been making. I think some of the content I have shot in the last several months is some of my best yet. There are scenes I would love to post screen caps for, ideas that were executed in new and exciting ways. But…
I don’t want to keep putting the cart before the horse. It’s hard to set up your own release dates, then have shit fall apart and not be able to hit those dates. Uninvited 8 has been 90 percent complete since October. But I had opportunities to work with new talent in November, and when I spend my days off work flying to LA and then the following weekend backing up the project I just shot, that last 10 percent becomes impossible to finish.
I don’t have it in me to ship a half baked product. I try to go over every frame, audio, color correction, everything, so by the time it gets to you, I know it was to the highest ability I was able to output at that time. And I don’t want to do Uninvited 8 a disservice because I am too excited about releasing all the stuff that has been made after it.
The END of SHL also requires that tender love and care. I have the project already prepped, being chopped up, color corrected, prepping it for its debut. But I can’t tell you when its coming out, because for all I know, anything can happen between now and then.
I have had some members of my family (grandparents) health become problematic in the last six months. I spent a lot of time with them this year during Christmas and new years. And to be honest, I wouldn’t be surprised if their health collapsed in the very near future. Its been hard emotionally to find the energy to give these films my all when I am distracted with matters of the heart.
I hope too, in the next month or two, have several films wrapped so that in case of an emergency, I can have prearranged releases prepped so that if such a thing were to occur, you wouldn’t notice downtime. By July of this year it is my goal to have monthly releases, shot edited, and prepped, to have a consistently release schedule for the rest of this year.
I dont know if I will be able to accomplish such a feat. But its what I have been aiming towards. I want 2020 to be my biggest and best year in this genre. I hope you can join me and forgive me for the patience I have asked of you in the last year. Cause I have been working towards this and I have made a big personal investment in new equipment seeing to it that the only excuse I have, is my own work ethic.
I know anyone who has purchased a preorder from me has entrusted me in a way I didn’t think was possible and I am super grateful for. I am not sure I can keep asking this level of trust from you. It wears me down anytime I have taken this on and the vocal minority have written comments slandering my ability to deliver to their standards. The END of SHL wouldn’t have been possible without preorders. But I don’t like reading conversations where members of this forum discuss wether or not I have ‘taken their money and run’. While its fair that people who have committed financially to something should have a voice regarding the project, emotionally it is beyond draining for me. The reality is I stay away from the forums, cause sometimes its hard to edit when you have the negative commentary in your mind. I have received threatening emails from multiple customers, numerous back charges with purchases made, illegal content posting daily on streaming sites of previous films I have made.
Sometimes what stands out is a real kick to the ass. And don’t get me wrong, I get it. People want the thing they were promised sooner than later.
But I am a human being unlike the ladies in the stories we tell. For now, I hope you can muster up some more patience for me, I think you’ll love the results. Until then, I don’t know how much energy I will commit to responding to comments and questions here. Writing this post alone has been super draining. But
I hope that was informative. So here’s to 2020. I plan on coming to it with a vengeance.
Is it still possible to do pre-order?
Is it still possible to buy the supergirl movie ??
Sorry to go off topic, but I am looking to buy/download some of your early products, the Robyn videos, particularly Sparring Day and Unfinished Business. Are they available, and if so, how would I get them?
All previous Robyn films are off the market.
The red lipstick is an excellent touch!
Also, we really appreciate the update and honesty. It goes a long way.
Hope everything works out!
Have you a Patreon/Patreon-like-site?
I tend to spend my discretionary dollars on RPGs, CMON miniatures board games (the minis of which I use in my RPGs), & SHiB/SHiP porn.
It’s usually hardcore, but SHG-Media is the hard “R” exception that proves the rule! 🙂
Perhaps we could chip in for a month or two to help you defray costs as you level up your directing & film-making skills…
Bonne chance and Happy New Year!
I appreciate the time you took for a detailed explanation, though I think for most of us it wasn’t necessary, we’re just glad you’re OK. It sounds like the finished product will absolutely be worth the delays.
Have you ever considered starting a Patreon? It could be helpful for covering unexpected expenses like the ones you had last year, and it sounds like if things go to plan, you’ll soon have a steady output of content to make a membership well worth it for many of us here.
I don’t know Patreon would welcome my kind of content. And if I am already struggling with deadlines I dont want to add to the amount of them I miss.
Oh man, tons of xrated stuff on patreon. Totempole666 does the commoner webcomic there. Dustin Mills has a ton of xrated stuff in his patreon. All kinds of hentai rpg games are on patreon.
Patreon polices adult content which contains themes which they have judged to be unacceptable. In other words, they censor adult content providers. Patreon is okay with you funding porn through their service, but they’ll shut you down if they think that you’re producing anything to do with rape, incest, or anything else of which they disapprove. Take, for instance, adult rpg games, which you mentioned. I can name at least half a dozen adult game developers who have had to remove “prohibited” content from their games, because Patreon was going to shut down their accounts. Damien is producing rape scenes,… Read more »
wow I am so sorry to hear about that. And you really did not have to do that just guys I am sorry due many issues I won’t be able to get this out till ,,, That would be great. I think that you are very trustworthy but if something happened to you how would anyone ever know?
I am in my early 30s. I don’t really have plans for my potential demise. I am sure one of my industry friends who report that I am dead if I do indeed die.
Have you tried a proxy file workflow?
My workflow uses proxy files.
Im sorry to hear about your grandparents. Wish you nothing but the best.
Thanks for the update and really excited to see what you have come up with for 2020. Saw an image of Melody Marks hoping to see some teaser photos of what you made with her.
People on the internet can be real douchebags and it will never stop, I preordered the End of SHL months ago at the beginning when it wasn’t even recorded and I can wait one more month or weeks, it will not kill me, just glad to hear from you.
I am also sorry to hear about your grandparents health issues. Of course your family comes first. Take care of your self and your family. I love your videos and those who respect you will understand.
You do what you need to do. I’m sure almost all of us will understand, and delays don’t matter.
I don’t think the term “business practice” belongs in the conversation.
It’s not really a business.
Each film is an art project.
Pre-orders are patrons in the art sense, not the commerce sense — funding your process, knowing up front that details may change, the end product is an unknown number of months away, and we’re unlikely to hear much in the interim.
Every one of your videos has been great, never cared about ‘delay” cause when it does come out i will buy it.
Speaking only for myself, I’m not overly concerned about the delays. Of course I would rather see the film now, as opposed to waiting who-knows how much longer, but if it takes longer, so be it. I’m not sweating bullets.
So, once again, speaking only for myself, do what you have to do. Just drop us a line now and then to update us on the workflow.
I’m really sorry to hear about your grandparents health issues man. I can totally relate there. I can only speak for myself here, but I appreciate your candor and humility. As an artist I understand the process and the constant unknowns that interfere with timeframes. I also understand and appreciate your dedication to perfection and providing the best possible final product. There will always be people who want to shit on your cupcake, even while it’s still in the oven. (No clue where that came from) Just remember, the shit on the oven door does not make your cupcakes any… Read more »
Thank you for the thoughtful response.